Please read and tell me your opinions?

This is definitely well-written. It flows nicely and I didn’t have any trouble imagining the scenes in my mind. But if I had to offer some criticism, it would be that it was, at times, a little wordy. For example : “disdain and frustration filling his ever-maddening eyes” is too descriptive and I would take out “ever-maddening” because you have already used two words to tell us what his eyes look like. It can be hard for the reader to juggle numerous descriptions and, ultimately, make the scene less effective rather than more. Overall, though, this was a very nice piece of writing.